I have a lot of spare time these days, no money, very little to do etc. so I decided to plan my world domination. i am making some great progress.
Jacqui's Six Steps to Taking Over the World (copyright 2012)
1. Divide and conquer
The first problem i see is family. family seems to give people strength - you know, they are there forever, they are blood ties and there is not really anything that can change that. so my first idea is to break up families. a weakness is the family members who do not have blood ties - like husbands and wives. i think i will start lots of rumours about men and women so they dont trust eachother. i will have the heads up even before they even commit to one another.
yes, I will break up families. i will pretend the love people have in families isnt real and that people can only get it elsewhere. then i will make people believe that their families have damaged them and caused them psychological problems. i can suggest that their families arent normal and that wow, uncle harry is a really bad person...
so then i will offer solutions to these people. i will segregate humanity into factions who offer refuge and then have them fight against eachother.
hmm how will i do this? i know - i will create heaps of different teams and say that you have to choose. then when you have chosen, i will say that yours is the good one and the others are bad.
omg this is good. im onto something really big here.
Then (im so excited) i will get the teams to fight within themselves. "i saw you listening to the other team", "you broke the rules of our team", "you arent a very good player" "you have to prove you belong if you want to stay"
2. Promote blind faith
I know so really good lines. im going to put them into use things like;
i cant be with you if you dont trust me. if you love me you would trust me. im so disappointed that you dont trust me. what have i ever done to hurt you? how can you say im not a good person. didnt i give you that piano score? honestly you just dont appreciate anything i do for you.
but if they continue to question then i could create little problems in their lives, then come along and fix them. This is ingenius! why hasnt someone thought of this before.
fixing peoples problems. man they are just going to LOVE me. they dont have to know that i caused the problems in the first place - does it really matter anyway, that i did this. we are talking about love, and people are going to LOOOOOOOOVVEEE me. God im good. Jesus im so clever!
3. Offer prizes
Everyone likes a prize. its really cool - i even like prizes. so i can offer prizes. I know what people like. you know, people like nice things and good times. so i want to give them those things, theoretically.
so i will say that if you put every ounce of faith in me, your life will be heavenly and its only when you fall short of what you need to do, or dont love me enough, that you will have problems. through me you can have everything yippee!
there are bound to be others who disagree tho - so i will make it that they only get the goodies if they listen to only me - nobody else. i could say:
well i told you so, you know, that you wouldnt get the prize, because you listened to that other person. you know they are the rules, im sorry, my hands are tied. but if you give over you complete life now, then i could reconsider. because im a very fair person.
4. Get people to ignore the facts
deny deny deny - do you love me or not? dont you realise how much you hurt me when you try to use these rumours against me? after all i have done for you. what about all those problems i fixed for you (nudge nudge wink wink psst the ones i caused remember?)
5. Get people to question the facts
yes i can see that you found that out, but can you really trust what you see? i think not! how ridiculous that you would believe your own eyes. come on - you are delusional. do you think you need to take a few days off, or some medication? im really worried about you. you cause me so much worry. but im gonna stick by you ok? despite all the worry you cause me, i am the real deal - look your family deserted you didnt they? thank God i am here for you. Actually i am sent by God - did i mention that already?
6. Blame individuals
Entice people with things they want, then give them what they dont want and tell them that its better than what they wanted anyway. if their hearts were right they would see that.
i could say: boy oh boy do i need to be patient with you!
i can create impossible rules so they judge one another and themselves. they are more likely to turn to me for salvation if their lives are terrible - thats when they think of me more, and from fixing the other problems (you know the ones i created in the first place) i will be their first choice for help. so i need to cause them problems continuously. the more they resist, the greater the problems i will have to give them
This is awesome. i think i pretty much have things covered. ahh life is going to be soooo cool at the top.
But...i dont actually want that. World domination - way too much effort and way too much responsibility, if you ask me.
it actually takes a mammoth amount of energy to string even one person along. the whole world? i dont actually think im good enough for the job. (i know i know, i lack in the self belief department sometimes)
its kinda cool that we all have our own languages - its really interesting. its quite a challenge to find the middle ground - but there is always a middle ground. how beautiful is it to be able to hold onto your own life and let others hold onto theirs - but meet every so often in communion with one another and venture into that middle ground.
a little plug - Healthy families create healthy communities and marriage is sacred. it has taken me soooo long to figure this one out. xoxoxoxoxoxo
Jacqui's Six Steps to Taking Over the World (copyright 2012)
1. Divide and conquer
The first problem i see is family. family seems to give people strength - you know, they are there forever, they are blood ties and there is not really anything that can change that. so my first idea is to break up families. a weakness is the family members who do not have blood ties - like husbands and wives. i think i will start lots of rumours about men and women so they dont trust eachother. i will have the heads up even before they even commit to one another.
yes, I will break up families. i will pretend the love people have in families isnt real and that people can only get it elsewhere. then i will make people believe that their families have damaged them and caused them psychological problems. i can suggest that their families arent normal and that wow, uncle harry is a really bad person...
so then i will offer solutions to these people. i will segregate humanity into factions who offer refuge and then have them fight against eachother.
hmm how will i do this? i know - i will create heaps of different teams and say that you have to choose. then when you have chosen, i will say that yours is the good one and the others are bad.
omg this is good. im onto something really big here.
Then (im so excited) i will get the teams to fight within themselves. "i saw you listening to the other team", "you broke the rules of our team", "you arent a very good player" "you have to prove you belong if you want to stay"
2. Promote blind faith
I know so really good lines. im going to put them into use things like;
i cant be with you if you dont trust me. if you love me you would trust me. im so disappointed that you dont trust me. what have i ever done to hurt you? how can you say im not a good person. didnt i give you that piano score? honestly you just dont appreciate anything i do for you.
but if they continue to question then i could create little problems in their lives, then come along and fix them. This is ingenius! why hasnt someone thought of this before.
fixing peoples problems. man they are just going to LOVE me. they dont have to know that i caused the problems in the first place - does it really matter anyway, that i did this. we are talking about love, and people are going to LOOOOOOOOVVEEE me. God im good. Jesus im so clever!
3. Offer prizes
Everyone likes a prize. its really cool - i even like prizes. so i can offer prizes. I know what people like. you know, people like nice things and good times. so i want to give them those things, theoretically.
so i will say that if you put every ounce of faith in me, your life will be heavenly and its only when you fall short of what you need to do, or dont love me enough, that you will have problems. through me you can have everything yippee!
there are bound to be others who disagree tho - so i will make it that they only get the goodies if they listen to only me - nobody else. i could say:
well i told you so, you know, that you wouldnt get the prize, because you listened to that other person. you know they are the rules, im sorry, my hands are tied. but if you give over you complete life now, then i could reconsider. because im a very fair person.
4. Get people to ignore the facts
deny deny deny - do you love me or not? dont you realise how much you hurt me when you try to use these rumours against me? after all i have done for you. what about all those problems i fixed for you (nudge nudge wink wink psst the ones i caused remember?)
5. Get people to question the facts
yes i can see that you found that out, but can you really trust what you see? i think not! how ridiculous that you would believe your own eyes. come on - you are delusional. do you think you need to take a few days off, or some medication? im really worried about you. you cause me so much worry. but im gonna stick by you ok? despite all the worry you cause me, i am the real deal - look your family deserted you didnt they? thank God i am here for you. Actually i am sent by God - did i mention that already?
6. Blame individuals
Entice people with things they want, then give them what they dont want and tell them that its better than what they wanted anyway. if their hearts were right they would see that.
i could say: boy oh boy do i need to be patient with you!
i can create impossible rules so they judge one another and themselves. they are more likely to turn to me for salvation if their lives are terrible - thats when they think of me more, and from fixing the other problems (you know the ones i created in the first place) i will be their first choice for help. so i need to cause them problems continuously. the more they resist, the greater the problems i will have to give them
This is awesome. i think i pretty much have things covered. ahh life is going to be soooo cool at the top.
But...i dont actually want that. World domination - way too much effort and way too much responsibility, if you ask me.
it actually takes a mammoth amount of energy to string even one person along. the whole world? i dont actually think im good enough for the job. (i know i know, i lack in the self belief department sometimes)
its kinda cool that we all have our own languages - its really interesting. its quite a challenge to find the middle ground - but there is always a middle ground. how beautiful is it to be able to hold onto your own life and let others hold onto theirs - but meet every so often in communion with one another and venture into that middle ground.
a little plug - Healthy families create healthy communities and marriage is sacred. it has taken me soooo long to figure this one out. xoxoxoxoxoxo
patent pending
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