Today's letter is a b c D - D is today's letter. D is today's letter because another word came into my head starting with D - despair. Im not exactly sure what it means, we will investigate that in a minute. But I can tell you how i feel, that has brought this word into my head.
Despair - deep heartache for someone you love. deep heartache because you can see them suffering enormously. deep heartache because they dont know how to communicate how bad things are. deep heartache because they dont know you can hear them
Deep heartache as you dont know if you suffer the circumstances or if you suffer watching the person you love suffer the circumstances.
Screams of anguish on both parties. writhing pain. hands tied. mouth mute. Then realising that you are suffering for yourself. you are the sufferer and the person watching the sufferer. there is nothing either of you can do.
The anguish is because you know you are a good person, and watching yourself - well that part of you watching yourself knows what an amazing person you are and wants to give you what you need, wants to give you what you deserve, wants to help you, wants to love you but doesnt know how to reach you. behind a glass pane.
That to me is despair. to me that is now.
1. To give up as beyond hope or expectation; to despair of.
2. To cause to despair.
huh - yes, both
Despair - deep heartache for someone you love. deep heartache because you can see them suffering enormously. deep heartache because they dont know how to communicate how bad things are. deep heartache because they dont know you can hear them
Deep heartache as you dont know if you suffer the circumstances or if you suffer watching the person you love suffer the circumstances.
Screams of anguish on both parties. writhing pain. hands tied. mouth mute. Then realising that you are suffering for yourself. you are the sufferer and the person watching the sufferer. there is nothing either of you can do.
The anguish is because you know you are a good person, and watching yourself - well that part of you watching yourself knows what an amazing person you are and wants to give you what you need, wants to give you what you deserve, wants to help you, wants to love you but doesnt know how to reach you. behind a glass pane.
That to me is despair. to me that is now.
1. To give up as beyond hope or expectation; to despair of.
2. To cause to despair.
huh - yes, both
No comments:
Post a Comment